Of course, I can't get the tf/mcu idea out of my head, so there's that to consider too. I've been trying to write this thing for a couple of years now and haven't really gotten anywhere with it save for a few scenes here and there that I might be able to weave into a story.
Nope, no clue. I guess I will surprise myself on November first.
Apparently James Roberts once intimated that the holoavatars in IDW represented the Cybtertonians chosen gender. This meant that Cyclonus is female, as are Bumblebee, Sunstreaker, and Bluestreak. Of course, I can no longer find this tweet or the Tumblr post where I originally saw it, but it got me to thinking. What if the only reason why Cybertronians have been consistently referred to as “he” is because of a limitation of language (after all, people in the West tend to fight back against gender neutral third person singular pronouns) and the fact that male is the cultural default. We see this when Caminus is introduced and the Caminans (Caminusans? Camis?) refer to everyone as “she” because that is their default gender. Now I will admit, I don’t like the Left Hand of Darkness thing that IDW then went on to do - the literal Men are from Cybertron and Women are from Caminus explanation, but we’re talking about my personal headcanon here and, thus, I will ignore what I damned well feel like ignoring!
( Below the cut because wow this got long! )
Hopefully I will be able to get all of this across well and without offense. Please feel free to comment. Especially if you are not cisgender, because I can only imagine your point of view of this and I want something less offensive than is often seen (and yes, I am looking in the direction of Furman). Also if anyone has any thoughts on gender and holoavatars that's be great. So far my plan is to go with what has been presented in IDW, but I'm making it up for those who haven't been shown yet. So far I am focusing on the Combaticons and making Onslaught and Vortex female and Blast Off, Swindle, and Brawl male.
That's it. I have no other plans. I'll keep trying, I'll keep reading what's out there and ... yeah.
Look, the fact of the matter is that I am feeling depressed again and I'm finding that I really don't care to work on something that I'll probably never post.
Work (specifically the crap politics at work) are driving me crazy and are destroying my desire to write however I have decided not to give in to it. I will not let my co-workers' idiocy take this away from me! ... We'll see how long this lasts.
So, I am hoping to take part in the July Camp Nano so that requires some plotting on my part. Luckily this is going to be a fanfic based on my play through of Fallout 4 so that requires less thinking on my part.
As for other things, if I can get the bunnies to spawn again, I'm going to try my hand at another Librarians/Warehouse 13 crossover, especially since the one I wrote was taken so well. It's incredible what some feedback will do for the desire to write - and I now that's rich coming from me, since I'm terrible at leaving feedback. I'm trying to get better ont hat one though.
Lastly Transformers. I'm currently in a bit of a love/hate with the fandom. It seems that there's a lot of anger going around - people insisting that writers are terrible for writing triggery stuff (when the warnings and tags are clear), or insisting that writers only work on the readers' preferred pairing or fanon interpretation. So none of that is fun. But also, I'm no longer following the IDW comics (I have issues with them that I won't go into here because it might lead to a rant) and that's all that's being written lately. I no longer have any idea who the characters or situations are and as good as some of the writing is, it feels like I'm reading fic from another fandom. And lastly a lot of the fic now is BDSM/sticky/dark fic and I have discovered that much of the subject matter covered is triggery for me. It's a real pity because I love so many of these writers, but if reading the fics makes me angry, what's the point is reading them? It also seems that since I don't write that kind of fic my readership is pretty low.
Now, I know - Write for yourself! And that's true; we need to write for ourselves, but we post for others. So I have two requests still outstanding and I have two unfinished fics as well as a bunny periodically gnawing away at me. I will work on those and post the requests, but the others I will keep until I am good and ready to post them. Maybe after the next Bayformers movie comes out. I may think that the movies are crap, but at least they are good at bringing new blood into the fandom. And maybe that's what we need. I dunno.
So that's it for June. If I'm quiet it's because I'm working on fic or because I've staple-gunned a coworker to the wall and am on the lamb.
Fandom: Fallout 4
Characters & Relationships: Female Sole Survivor
Warnings: Spoilers for the end of Fallout 4 based on a Minutemen ending (including mentions of the Far Harbour DLC). Lots of rambling!
Summary: Nora has done everything she had set out to do when she woke in Vault 111 and now she has to learn to live with the consequences.
( It's All Over But The Crying )
Yes, a game has eaten my soul and I have been lost to it. Now, yeah, I know that fans from the old, pre-Bethesda days of the game have issues with it and yes, it does have some pretty hilarious (and sometimes oh so frustrating) bugs, but I'm enjoying a pretty much open sandbox survival game. I love the moral options and that you have so many paths that you can follow. I mean, yeas, I absolutely adore the Bioshock series, but it really is a bit of a railroad. In Fallout you really can do just about anything. Including killing and eating annoying NPCs apparently. No, I haven't tried that yet, but it is an interesting option to have. And I will admit, it has been very tempting to do something horrible to Knight Rhys and Marcy Long -- honestly, more Rhys than Long.
All that being said, I do with that there were more than four dialogue options. I would love to be able to ask Preston about the Brotherhood or the Children of the Atom (yeah, I know, minor characters but still a semi faction). I would love to be able to let Rhys know that I was a lawyer/soldier and probably do have a rudimentary understanding of Latin mottoes (in my mind Nate was a Marine). I would love to be able to have a minor breakdown after the first fight with the Deathclaw and to be able to do more to comfort Nick. ... Basically there are a ton of questions/actions I'd like to take that the game doesn't allow for. One noted example is when you run across the Gunners who are running a toll on a bridge. Your only options are to pay or kill them. Why can't I just acknowledge the cost, apologize for stepping in their territory, and then leave? I mean, yeah, they're likely to still shoot me, but then I can kill them in self-defense rather than have it be murder. Why can't I offer to hug Nick or Cait? And why can't I ask Codsworth how he stayed sane for all these centuries?
So, yeah, there are a lot of questions and that's leading to a lot of bunnies that might lead to a Fallout 4 Novelization fic. They're probably a dime a dozen, but I figure it can't hurt to try. Maybe it'll be an idea for June Camp NaNo or for the real NaNo in November. the Adventures of Nora Rigg, Sole Survivor and former JAG lawyer (hey, it's as good an excuse as any for how she's so good with those guns!)
In other news, work is trying to kill me and I am doing the work of four separate people/positions so I'm more than a little stressed and that is effecting my writing output. That means that the above plans are going to be slow in coming. But they are started, so that's a start, right?
And lastly, I may actually post a picture of myself for the first time at some point later this month because I am allowing a section of my hair to go silver and I will (if all goes to plan) have a Rogue-like stripe in my hair by mid-May. I'm not exactly comfortable with photos of me but if this works I'm really going to want to share!
First time I’ve written something Transformers and I succeed in depressing myself with unnecessarily cruel IDW Smokescreen.I really need to break away from depressing fic and not try to write in the IDW-verse. This is random, unedited, and written in less than an hour. But it's writing and it's a start. This is kind of sort of a sequel to Smokescreen Leaves the Lost Light.
( Depressing ramblings that is pretending to be fic )
Once I am sure that everything has been imported here, I will be deleting my LiveJournal account. Things are quieter here, but hopefully as more people come over that will change.
EDIT: Does anyone know if there is a way to crosspost from Dreamwidth to Tumblr?
The episode had two plots, one involving the murder of a young woman who is tied to a 16 to 18 year old Lovecraft (he was 14 in 1904, by the way), and the second involving Mrs. Brackenreid reading Dracula for her book club. The episode features Lovecraft obsessed with death, decay, blood, and women and had none of Lovecraft's usual themes of cosmic horror, inherited guilt, the unknown, and a descent into madness. It was like the writer wanted to do something about Bram Stoker (because blood, death, and seduction are his themes) and then threw Lovecraft into the episode at the last second either because he could or (and this is more likely) because the CBC told him to since Lovecraft is becoming popular again.
A 30 second Wikipedia search would have told the author that Lovecraft's mother was institutionalized in 1915 not 1903, that he was a very sickly child prone to night terrors and sleep paralysis, and that the Lovecraftian themes that made up his not-so-little corner of horror had been with him since he was a child. What they presented was poorly executed and all the atmospherics and dutch angles were not going to save it.
But the writer of said episode tragically passed away and that apparently means that no one can criticize him any more. I guess that means that Howard Phillips Lovecraft gets a pass on his casual racism then too, right?
So, yeah. Time for a break that will be spent working on my semi-original novel. They say that a change is better than a rest and I hope that that's the case.
So, February plans ... So, I think that I am going to take it simple this month:
1. Smokescreen-Bluestreak - Survivor's Guilt: Bluestreak tries to comfort Smokey on the Anniversary of the fall of Praxus and tries to figure out why he has never partaken in any of the memorials
2. Jazz-Smokescreen - Choices: This is the third chapter of You Remind Me of Someone I Used to Know. Jazz is trying to find out what exactly it is that "Cortano" said to Ratchet that has the medic so hot and bothered, and what exactly it is that the Praxian is lying about.
3. Transformers/MCU Crossover: I have a ton of vague ideas for this one, bits of scenes and pieces of dialogue. Since I have no idea where it is that I'm going with it, I am going to try something really radical (and possibly stupid) - I am going to try to write the ideas down as they come to me, scene by scene and see if I have a fic when I'm done with it. It'll sort of be a patchwork story. Or maybe an attempt at an epistolary story. We'll see. My hope is that if I can just write a little a day, I can get out of this funk that I'm in.
So that's it. If I get something finished, great, but my plan is just to write. That's it, that's all.
Oh, and I may also try to finish the Snowflake Challenge, because that went nowhere fast ...
In your own space, create a list of at least three fannish things you'd love to receive, something you've wanted but were afraid to ask for - a fannish wish-list of sorts. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your wish-list if you feel comfortable doing so. Maybe someone will grant a wish. Check out other people's posts. Maybe you will grant a wish. If any wishes are granted, we'd love it if you link them to this post.
I don't like asking for these things in general. It's hard for me because that little inner voice keeps reminding me that my fannish wants are probably stupid anyways so why ask. I'm endeavoring to smother that little voice this year, so here we go:
1. I would love for someone else to write a G1 Smokescreen/Ratchet fic. There are some for Prime, but I think I may be the only one writing the pairing for G1.
2. Fan art is always nice. I received a lovely piece based on one of my fics a few years back so I feel greedy asking for more, but I really wish that my works might inspire an artist. Mainly this is because I can only draw stick figures myself.
3. I would love it if someone could point me int he direction of some patterns for either crochet or needlework of some Transformers inspired craftwork.
In your own space, post recs for at least three fanworks that you did not create. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.
So, let's get this list started:
1. Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men: Because somebody has to! - I'm including this as a fanwork because these two are fans. Big fans. It is clear that they both adore the X-men and they are bound and determined to explain the whole history of the series. Which will take a while. They've been at this since 2014 and have only just gotten to X-Cutioner's Song. They post weekly (usually on Monday) and they will explain an arc of one of the X-Men comics - and by that, I mean, anything involving a mutant involved with the X-men line. So, X-Men, Xcalibur, New Mutants, etc, etc, etc, and they avoid the other series like Avengers, Fantastic Four, Deadpool, etc save for when there is a direct crossover. I imagine that it's for the sake of their sanity more than anything else. So, if you're interested in Marvel's X-Men series', go check them out. Seriously, they are great!
2. Archiving for the Ages: Significant Episodes in the Life of a Yithian by ultharkitty - There aren't a whole lot of Lovecraft/Mythos fanfics out there - maybe 350 on A03 - so I was really, really glad to discover this one. This story is a sort of retelling of "The Shadow Out of Time" told from the other side of the story. Now, I believe that you can understand this if you haven't read "Shadow", but it wouldn't hurt to read the inspiring story if you haven't already. The big advantage that this fanfic has is that it is written in a far more modern style (yes, I know that Lovecraft can be a tad dense) and it shows a wonderful use of non-gendered pronouns! In this story we learn of the lives and problems of the Yithians from "Shadow" - what they are doing, why they're doing it, and the whole socio-political world in which they find themselves. And, we learn how humanity effects the Mythos.
3.Maggie Fitzgerald and the Saltwater Drip by antistar_e (kaikamahine) - Judging by the hits, kudoes, and comments, this is not an unknown or underappreciated fic; however, since i tend to hang in Transformers circles, I am hoping that I can introduce new people to this wonderful story. It is basically a modern telling of how Spider-Gwen comes to be in the Amazing Spider-man verse. It's written in third person present tense and it is written beautifully. Gwen is a realistic, well written girl who is really like a lot of young women out there. She needs to learn how to use and not abuse her powers and how to live in this new world in which she finds herself.
In your own space, set some goals for the coming year. They can be fannish or not, public or private. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.
So goals. I don't tend to like setting goals because they so often fall by the wayside and then I feel like crap when they aren't accomplished. So I'm going to keep it really simple this year. My goal is to post twelve things - be they fics, chapters, or flash fiction pieces. I may even post some of the bits and pieces I'm working on in the Marvel/TF fic.
So twelve posts. One post per month. That is the primary goal and the secondary goal is to fill in the AU world-building I seem to be working on with the Smokescreen/Ratchet fics. This should be attainable. Twelve is attainable.
In your own space, share a book/song/movie/tv show/fanwork/etc that changed your life. Something that impacted on your consciousness in a way that left its mark on your soul. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.
I think that there are only a handful of things that really stayed with me as being truly excellent or innovative, but those things really do stay with me and I would miss them if I could never listen to or watch or read them again.
Oh there are so many that I could choose from but for sake of brevity, I will limit myself to Westworld.
Westworld was beautifully written with some real depth to the plot and characterizations. It told the story in a non-conventional way and I suspect that it is the kind of story that will be watchable again and again and, possibly again. Each of the characters is well crafted and it really shows what a writer can do with a non-linear plot.
So, it's Snowflake Challenge time again, and since I didn't do this last year, I really, really need to do this this year. See, I don't make resolutions at New Year (since resolutions are just asking to be broken), but I have made a decision to post more this year. And what better way to start than with the Snowflake Challenge?
In your own space, post a rec for at least three fanworks that you have created. It can be your favorite fanworks that you've created, or fanworks you feel no one ever saw, or fanworks you say would define you as a creator. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.
( Fic Recs )
Title: The Polyhex Candidate: Chapter 19 (and on AO3)
Fandom: Transformers: Generation One
Characters & Relationships: Smokescreen, Mirage, Jazz, Prowl, Ratchet, Bumblebee, Optimus Prime, Ultra Magnus, Red Alert, Ironhide, Perceptor, Wheeljack.
Jazz/Prowl, Wheeljack/Ratchet/Perceptor, mentions of Smokescreen/Swindle, Jazz/Mirage, Jazz/Smokescreen.
Warnings: graphic violence, dub-con, attempted rape, implication of bondage, mentions of rape, mentions of torture, reprogramming, tactile, spark-sex, plug-and-play
Summary: A year ago Jazz was captured by the Decepticons and reprogrammed into a walking time-bomb. Now that he has returned to the Autobots his new programming has kicked in and he has left chaos in his wake. It's up to Smokescreen and Mirage to find Jazz and bring him back to their side and back to sanity before he is completely lost. Meanwhile Prowl and Ultra Magnus try to keep Iacon from destroying itself as panic grips the populace, and as Prowl fights for his sanity after a year's separation from his bonded and the sure knowledge that Jazz may not survive.
( Chapter 19 )
So, I already said over on Tumblr, I am aiming to have the next chapter of "Polyhex Candidate" posted by the end of the 25th (since Christmas will be very, very quiet for me this year), and I'm aiming to finish the next chapter of "Someone I Used to Know" as well. I have more scene ideas for the TF/MCU crossover, and I think that I may try to write several shortfics on that, rather than a long one. I have lots of ideas for the story, but no real direction and I think that several short pieces may help there. I might even try my hand at spinning off from the IDW/Avengers in concept and then go for the humanized angle later once there's an established relationship.
However, that story is starting to tie into my "Medical Psychology" series and that one needs a lot of world building in order to proceed. I may just start posting some of my headcanon in regards to the war, Cybertronian culture, Cybertronian reproduction and gender distinctions, and all the other machinations I have running around in my mind. The thing is that there is a lot out of IDW that I really like in concept and dislike in execution, and I'd like to play with those ideas and make them work with my own fanon and the extended fanons that I've adopted. And that ties in to the MCU crossover in that I need to decide what to keep and what to throw away - because there are aspects of the MCU that I really, really, really dislike.
So that's the tentative plan for my next few weeks as we close out the new year. And hopefully it will help me get on track for next year.